Painted Moments

There is an awkward silence that seems to encompass her life.

If it had a color, it would be Green. Like the deepest ocean, waves crashing, Green.

There is an indescribable emptiness that sneaks up on her every now and then.

If it had a color, it would be Black. Just before dawn, darkest of dark, Black.

There is a sense of panic, a strange presence that beckons her in the middle of the night.

If it had a color, it would be Yellow. Vibrant, blaring, cautionary, Yellow.

There is a veil of uncertainty that defies her ability to trust.

If it had a color, it would be Grey. Charcoal, dark, steel-cold, Grey.

There is a chill in the air that will not allow her to find warmth.

If it had a color, it would be White. Crisp,wind blown, fallen snow, White.

There is a storm of confusion, pulling her this way and that.

If it had a color, it would be Orange. Fiery, frantically spinning, Orange.

There is angst deep within her heart. Unexplainable, and equally undeniable.

If it had a color it would be Blue. Not like the sky, nor the deepest see, more like the color of her eyes, Blue.

There is an inkling of hope that battles her heart for her very own soul.

If it had a color, it would be Crimson. Blood shed by a loving Savior, that she might finally rest , Crimson.

(c)Lisa M. Bennett 1/26/2009

The Ride of My Life

There is a certain kinda of CRAZY that compels someone to look for the steepest, loopiest, twistiest, fastest and any other "est" I may have forgotten, when it comes to roller coasters. Just my opinion...not a proven fact...no rotten eggs, please! Truth be told, I ascribe to the theory that "it takes one to know one".

Yep, I am she. Lover of all things twisty, turny, loopy, spinny, dippy and droppy...throw in a measure of extreme speed and I'm as happy as a pig in snot. (ewe)


I just love roller coasters. For anyone who knows me, it might come as a surprise because, though I am relatively social, I prefer a small get together, a few close friends, quiet evenings at home, and reading and writing over rock concerts and big parties. I am pretty calm when it comes to my general nature, and live a life that is pretty peaceful.

That is, until I am at a theme park. *OK, admittedly there was a time (or two) at a hockey game (or two) when I might have exhibited possible signs of my inner "wild me" having surfaced after she slipped the outer "calm me" a "Mickey" when I wasn't looking...but there really is no way to prove it. N0 pictures, no one who could testify that it was, in fact"me". So, we will leave that possibility to the realm of "myths and urban legends".

So, back to roller coasters. Yeah...there is this insane drive deep within me that just LOVES the excitement derived from a good 4 alarm roller coaster. You know, the ones that warn you half a mile before you get to the gate of the ride that those with heart conditions should not ride this ride, followed, every eighth of a mile as you wind your way through the lines turn by turn, by yet another warning for those under 5 feet, those who are pregnant, those who are over 200 lbs, and those who "cherish life"...BINGO...that's my ride!


There is something about a good roller coaster...day dreaming here... especially the ones you find that start in broad daylight and go pitch dark! You know, a dip, a sharp turn, then POOF~you are in a cave entering a darker darkness than any you could have imagined! Music blaring, never knowing when the next turn is coming, or if you are about to drop, invert or loop. Only the eery sound...click...click...click as you climb, followed by silence. Then...*dramatic pause... a release with a whirring buzz that clearly screams FREE FALL!!!

In these types of coasters (light to dark) you go from a sense of know exactly what is coming with a bit of a head start on mentally preparing for it, to a very handicapped lesser vantage point where simply being strapped in (thank God) with belts, bars, straps and pads is all you really know for sure. (But still, you check, double check and pray as your train leaves the station).

Ahhh...yeahhh baybeee!!! What a thrill!

I wonder what it is, really, that makes that experience "fun" for me. I wonder what the draw is because just typing this out has me wondering why on EARTH would I EVER want to do such a thing!?! (REPEATEDLY) ... REALLY!!!???

There is something to be said for driving up to an amusement park, and as I get closer and closer the monstrous mass of twisted, turned, high climbing, steep dropping steel just makes my heart race. Closer still and I see more clearly the magnitude of this mass, the complexity, the ingenuity, the cute little cart that looks like a space shuttle (with only padded bars and a seat belt) that will carry me along the journey...I am thrilled!

Reality check...

So-why is that I can look at this craziness that I have just gone into great detail to explain, and STILL check the box that says, "yep, sign me up"???
...and yet, WHY, when it comes to "life", the twists, the turns, the light to dark (back to light) phases that make it "life" with it's unforeseen twists, dips, steep-zero-gravity-free-fall moments, amazing highs where the view is incredible, only to see the ground, in a blink of an eye, closing in on me at me at 90 miles an hour, I mean a life that looks HUGE, I mean GIGANTIC from where I sit, and the closer I get, the more I want to scream in terror and run from it?

I sounded pretty tough just a few paragraphs ago...yeah, me and my big talk, brave walk, high horse, saddle-me-up jibber jabber. Truth be told? I'm am a red blooded, wimped out scaredy chicken, and sometimes, I am just not brave enough to face life for what it appears to be from where I stand.

In my mind though, I resolve that I will place myself in the safety of the Lord. My strapped, padded, steel barred, extra strong-5 point restraint system that assures me that no matter the twists, the turns, the sudden drops, or steep climbs-no matter the loop-de-loops or sharp turns, I am safely "in" with my hat and sunglasses stowed for safe keeping. Perhaps those loop-de-loops of life are the very tool the Lord uses to shake free some excess cargo we had been carrying around needlessly, just like the roller coaster did with my favorite Ray Bans about 15 years ago? (Grrrr)

Perhaps, those times in the darkest darkness when we don't know where to turn, or if we are about to go into free fall, it is best to trust and remember that we are on a track, pre-designed and created perfectly to lead us home. Though the ride gets a little temultuous the minute we leave the gate, it can also be exhilarating, full of surprises, adventurous, and unexpected twists and turns...all for the thrill of it.

There are times in my life that I am glad to be on the ride. That it is exactly the thrill and excitement I had hoped it would be. But, in all fairness, there are times when I am strapped in, holding on and wondering...as I remember having already been on "this" one, OK, when does this end? Can I get off now? Uh...if I fake puke, will the operator stop this thing so I can go find another life to ride? (The answer to that is no)...this is my ride, my life, I'm strapped in tight and I know that the ride ain't over till the operator says its over.

Though we may not suspect when that dip is coming, the highs are a sight to behold and usually those times are the times we never forget. I'm just saying that perhaps, just like a roller coaster, some built for speed to carry us quickly through the scariest times, others built for enjoyment that trod a little slower to take in a view of the ducks in the pond over yonder, life is presented to us much the same way. And, yeah, some folks are in the kiddie coaster and some (whether they choose it or not) are on the Mega Monster, strap in and hold on coaster.

Funny how life can have much of the same characteristics of the very thing I long for, yet, be exactly what I fear the most. Nevertheless, I'm in line, and I believe I am in for the ride of my life.

A better writer would probably take a lot more time to think about, lay out, and find some fancy schmancy ending that tidied up the whole thing all nice and neat. (Whelp... bully for them! ...not so much for me).

I think that is the end of this post...(I hear that collective sigh of relief!)

...

Uhhmmm...yep-that was the end. You can go now ;0)

How, you ask?

Last night, at church we were ask a question as part of the "table discussion" part of the evening where we share thoughts, or ideas and what not, the question was :


How does faith help us when we don't know the "how" of what God wants to do for us.

I admit it was a bit difficult to pin point the exact "answer" because the question was ambiguous for as concise as it was.

Maybe it will help to point out that the topic of the evening was how to know God's will for our lives and whether we go left or right, date him, or not. Take the job, don't take the job, buy the house, don't buy the house. If we are supposed to start a new ministry, or not. Most of us get stumped even when we get the answer...with the big question..."how"?

The truth is that we just have to take the steps of faith, one at a time. And, as our pastor demonstrated so well, as the lights were dimmed to darkness and all we saw was the glowing candles from each of the tables, with vague silhouettes of those gathered around, that God's word truly is a light unto our path, even in the darkness...and if all we see is a twinkle of light, we can trust Him as we walk in that direction , that He lit our path. Even if only for the next step. Somewhat like peddling that bike, the faster we pedal the more stable we become. (Thanks for the analogy Phil !)

I almost ALWAYS over think things...just a quirk of who I am, and imagined myself taking that one step...in the dark, toward that beacon of light, however big or small. Even though I don't know what surrounds me in the darkness, I am focused on the light, on what has become clear and just exercises that faith that is often exercising me.

We began to discuss this around our table. How do we take the next step? How do we know what God's will is, so that we can know "how" to take the next step. How do we know our path? How on earth do I make it to the end of the month? The "hows" were flying!

The truth is, I look back over my life, and I think "HOW" did I get here? I never would have imagined that each step would lead me to what is a pretty extraordinary life. But, there were(and still are) so many "hows" that may go a lifetime unexplained!

I don't know how I managed to raise three amazing kids on 8 bucks an hour for most of their lives. I don't know how I managed to find my way into a profession that I was never educated in, whether it was criminal and family law, or the mortgage business. I just know that the opportunities presented themselves, and I took the chance. I had to take the step as the light turned on...but the point is THE LIGHT TURNED ON. I don't know how I was able to manage my first year in this business, when the pay is commission only and there were months where I wouldn't get paid at all. I only know that tiny miracle after tiny miracle of God's grace and mercy in my life ushered me (sometimes a bumpy ushering), to today. Whether it was a reimbursement of an overpayment from two months prior that showed up in my mailbox, and was 18 bucks more than the bill I needed to pay or an extension of grace from someone until I could meet that obligation.

No matter what you call it, I know I have so much and have been blessed so tremendously. I have wonderful friends, and some pretty special family, a job that I love, a beautiful home, and many luxuries that I simply don't deserve. How?...good question. One step at a time, one relationship at a time, God has directed, blessed, and provided exceedingly and abundantly above and beyond what I could think or ask. Just as His word says that He will. I can't always pinpoint exactly the how of it...but to answer the question...faith is what helps us to take one step at a time, in the direction of the path that the Lord is faithful to reveal to us, and the "how" of it is truly God's mystery and we often don't see or appreciate until we look back.

...and I realized that for me...the "how" is the unexplained, unrecognized miracle of it all!

I AM

This is something I wrote a while back. It's funny how old things really do become new. I really needed to remember this today. I hope you find YOUR "I AM" here too!

I AM
Who are you Lord that I would fret what happens next to me?
Who are you Lord that I would doubt a future I don’t see?
Who are you Lord that I would cry an endless sea of tears?
Who are you Lord that I would chose bondage to my fears?
Who are you Lord that I would walk timid and unsure?
Who are you Lord that I would rather quit than to endure?
Who are you Lord that I would fail to live a life that’s good?
Who are you Lord that I would ask, yet feel misunderstood?
Who are you Lord that I would lie in bed yet not find sleep?
Who are you Lord that I would wrestle turmoil settled deep?
Who are you Lord that I would pray yet fail to hear your voice?
Who are you Lord that I would fall and wonder, was it choice?
Who are you Lord that I would ask of you, yet again today?
Who are you Lord that I would find, I simply had to pray?
(c) Lisa Bennett, 2006

And then I am reminded…

I am, "I AM", The Alpha and the Omega, The Beginning and the End.

I Am Elohim, The Lord your God Who Created you.

I Am El-Elyon, your God Most High, supreme ruler of all.

I am El Roi, the God Who Sees. Nothing gets by me.

I am El Shaddai, the All Sufficient One, I am all you need.

I am Addonai, "The Lord", not "a" lord…THEE LORD.

I am Jehovah, Self Existent One. I Am Who I Am.

I am Jehovah-Jireh, The Lord Who Will Provide. No need you have is greater than My provision.

I am Jehovah-Rapha the Lord Who Heals All Things.

I Am Jehovah-Nisi, the Lord Your Banner. Your victory is in Me.

I am Jehovah-Mekodishkem, The Lord Who Sanctifies You. You are set apart, you are holy, because I AM.

I Jehovah-Shalom the Lord Your Peace. Rest in Me.

I am Jehovah Sabaoth, the Lord of Hosts. When you are failing and powerless,drowning in your extremity you come to Me.

I am your Jehovah-Raah…the Lord Your Shepherd. Because of my love for you, you will not go far. I keep watch to guide you and comfort you by My rod and My staff.

I am your Jehovah-Tsidkenu, the Lord, Your Righteousness. Deceitful wickedness, hopelessness, and dark hours spent fretting judgment and failure, are not for you, because of who I Am.

I am Jehovah-Shammah, the Lord Who is There. You are not alone, I am with you there.

…And, I come to find that He is so much more, and that my peace returns, my fears fade, my hope renews and joy replaces grief, sadness, and despair all because I asked, and He answered! We serve a mighty God.


...on that note, I am happy to report that I will hold off on my Boy George blog post...though his make up job was always a sight to behold...I think it will have to wait for a day when I can wrap my brain around the funnier side of life.

Maybe Today

It's out of my hands, I have no say
Not an ounce of control, left only to pray
...
I wrestle within, anger and fear
Toiling and desperate to know You are here
...
Why must I linger so long in this place?
When I thought that I'd run, and won this race
...
I am much too tired and I'm just not strong
I've got nothing left, except this broken heart's song
...
I long to hear You, in whisper or shout
That You're ever near me, and I needn't doubt
...
I wait once again, and on bended knee pray
With a hopeful heart that "maybe today"
...
You are my covering, my shelter my shield
My strong place to lean, my brokenness healed

...
Again Lord I'll wait, and I'll seek Your face
Till my heart finds peace, and can I rest in Your grace

(c) Lisa Bennett 01/08/09

Zygoraph

Yeah...you read it right..ZYGORAPH...

What is it you ask? A skin rash perhaps? A type of chemical that strips wood...METAL???? A tiny sea-urchin-squiggly-life-form thingy? Uhhh...yeah, nope...None of the above.

I wondered what it was myself...as I typed it EXACTLY as it read (and was instructed to do)...in order to leave a comment on my friend's blog. REALLY? LAAAME!

It's funny how we are now required by a machine to type out "per instruction" what we see, into a little box in order for said machine to confirm that she who is typing is HUMAN and NOT another machine! How crazy is that!? I practically (but not completely) lost my need to leave a sarcastic yet slightly witty comment altogether after several attempts, and of course each time, the letters/word changed and if I were to spend much time considering it, I would be darn near convinced that they kept getting harder to spell and more difficult to see.

I LOVE the Internet. I am an information junkie. I love learning new things and gadgett collecting are one of my past times. I love adapters and converters, jump drives and usb extension cables (yep, they really have them). If it is new, and cool...and connects or converts to something, I probably have one somewhere. Wireless printers that I can run from within my car as I charge my laptop right from my cigarette lighter. (which I always thought was a charger-not a lighter), to a cup heater for my new favorite mug.

I think it is just amazing how technology has just screamed passed me...fondly looking back to 1983 when I received my first microwave and marveled at the cleverness of such a thing I recall a few "golden moments" in particular.

Prior to that godsend of a contraption it took me a whole 2-3 minutes to warm up my then 9 month old baby boy's bottle on the stove, in a pot of water...under the constant state of "watch" for fear it would overheat. After I got the micro (warned to NOT stand "too close") I could "zap" a bottle in 20 seconds. Sure, NOW I know it's not the best thing for a baby to have "zapped" formula...but like MANY "new" things...those "side effects" didn't show up until MUCH later. *GULP- And now, I find myself standing at the microwave, tapping my fingers on the granite counter top (no longer your mother's laminate "easy clean" surface) anxiously waiting NEARLY TWO minutes for popcorn that SHOULD have only take 1.5. Read the label...that's what it says! ONE POINT FIVE...HELLOOOO-chop chop!

I could write so many posts about technology today. I am sure this is not the last...but, I just think it is amazing that there was a time not long ago when my mind was just BOGGLED as I stuffed a piece of paper into this clunky machine-dialed some one's telephone number and MY PAPER was now rolling out on their paper in THEIR office! Honestly...I am still quite astounded at how a facsimile works. (that is what they "USED" to call a "FAX" ;)

I charge you to watch your friends as they talk to one another. I could almost guarantee you...at some point...someone will "lol" or finish a sentence with their ghost typewriter as they gesture and speak at the same time. (when they do, think of me). But in a nice way :)

I am not one to buck the system...I appreciate all the modern conveniences...I really and truly do. I just remember being at Disneyland, (years ago) sitting in this auditorium and watching this stage circulate as different eras were revealed. As if life were rewound to the 40's (pre-television) and then fast forwarded to the "future" right before my eyes.

I gottah tell ya, when they started talking about phones that had no cords, and computers that ANYONE could carry around with them, I thought they were nuts...and at the very least, I was sure that IF that ever "actually" happened, surely, at that point we would be at the very end of technology. We would have invented, created and launched every last conceivable notion, and whim of an idea, made all the money off it we were going to, and then...we would all be sitting around fro the REST of our lives wishing we would have paced ourselves "even just a little bit" so that we had something to do in the year 2000. (assuming the world would survive that long). Oh...come on...you all heard the rumors too!

I am sitting here in bed...amusing myself while I type this out, on one of 4 laptops (not counting my daughter's), currently in my home. I have the power of going ANYWHERE I want in this world with the touch of one key..."enter" that's all it takes...a few W's, a dot here and there, "enter" and poof...I am in Hawaii...ASTOUNDING. (and instant...no airfare to stunt my agenda).

Truly...we live in an amazing time folks, in an amazing country where the luxuries of this world practically fall into our laps. We are a privileged, blessed people, with many MANY opportunities, possibilities, and usually...someone, somewhere crazy enough to back them.

I am chuckling a bit to myself...my flat screen TV that weighs about 8 lbs,(my first television, I bet, weighed 80!) is 3 feet away, and I am straining to reach the night stand where the remote (that allows me to stay comfortably in bed) is waiting for me to push its button so it finally has it's chance to "do it's thing".

I am simply amazed...and easily amused...life at the touch of a button. :)

Ah Hah!

I get a little restless from time to time. I am not really sure what it is...but, time has taught me to take heed. I would (as a younger woman) do some fairly irrational things when I got to feeling this way...uncertain as to what my next move should be, or whether or not what I was doing was even what God wanted me to be doing...never knowing how it was all supposed to unfold. Do I go left, or right...Straight? Do I go at all? It all just makes me a little crazy-ya know?


Tonight, we were studying a little more about the life of David. Far from perfect, a young man who grew to love the Lord deeply and passionately. Yet not without first failing God miserably making HUGE mistakes, and poor decisions. Still nothing he did (or didn't do), could make God love him less...for that matter, nothing he did, could make God love him more. I get that, because I have children. I love them beyond words and sure, they do things sometimes that I wish they would not do, or would not do "yet"...or, they don't do things they ought to be doing by now, etc. The truth is, there is nothing they do, (or not) that changes my love for them. And, in my feeble mind, I get that. I know God's ways are bigger...and truly not our ways. I know that there is no way to equate my understanding to the true vastness of God's love for me...I reckon David had similar thoughts as he learned more intimately about the God he loved and served.


I really love learning about David. It has put a lot of things into perspective for me. I love the Lord, truly, I do...but, wow can I be an idiot. I have made some crazy stupid choices for my life...things that not only hurt me, or took me down a path I wish I never knew existed, but, hurt the people I love most as well. It takes understanding grace to grow past this...David undererstands grace.


Now, this really isn't a "REGRET" post, rather, in the famous words of OPRAH...an "AH HAH MOMENT" kind of post.


I had one tonight...it was kind of cool. I imagine I probably studied this and perhaps even knew it before...but, I needed to hear it again, remember, or re-know it tonight. David waited on the Lord and the Lord gave him enough information about what he was to do next...but only enough for the moment. And, David found peace enough with just that much information. David was predestined to be king, known as "a man after God's own heart", chosen and made great...if he can find peace in only knowing what he must "in that moment" SURELY, I could too. (?)


Of course I have the benefit of reading on...I learned what happened next for David and know how his story ends...but, as he lived his life, he only knew "enough"...God only revealed what David needed "for the moment" and, God does the same for us.


I pray I can find peace in that truth. I hope that in me is a greater being that will grow to trust God "in the moment" EVERY moment. Not only for what is revealed and made known, but for all the possibilities and unknowns that, until my life is lived out to its very last breath, cannot be revealed or I would do everything in my power to make it what "I" think it should be based on my limited understanding of what is best for me, and how I want my life to look.


I see why God would not give me foreknowledge. It keeps me close to him. Like following close behind someone who has already been somewhere I had been instructed or wanted to go.


Someone (I can't remember where I heard this) recently shared the example-if you are required to get to a specific place, but have no idea how to get there, and are told to follow "so and so" in the silver car...you will nearly ride their tail pipe all the way to the destination. You know what I mean, we have all done this. Perhaps get a little nervous if there is more than a car's length or two between you. If they were to get too far ahead, something might get between you and them. And, if they signal to turn, and you miss it, who knows where you will end up?! Surely, this is NOT the time to lag as far back as you can risking getting lost. We are focused, following closely, eyes on the leader, sporting our offensive and defensive driving skill all the way!


My relationship with Jesus is just the same. I need to stay close to Him, being sure not to get too far away. I can't let anything get in between me and the one who leads me to my destination. I see that it is important not to turn before the signal is given and that turning too late may eventually get us where we are going, but it certainly wasn't the quickest and best route. We must follow close behind with our eyes on the one who leads.


I look forward to next week's lesson...David, is a man after my own heart too.

Old is the new "Young"

Well...here we are. It's New Year's Day and I have managed to get all the way to 3:30 in the afternoon without making and breaking a New Year's Resolution. A small victory for me, and an all time record.

It's funny how over time I have learned to make resolutions that are more likely to be adhered to than in years past. I guess it comes with age, experience, and perhaps adapting to the reality that I never really take too many of my "resolutions-gone-by" seriously.

I know there were many years of "this year, 20 lbs!" Or, "this year, no sugar", *(HAH) or, "this year, I will be nicer to my siblings".

Granted some of those things are more important than others, but I have resolved to resolute to nothing. :)

Great...3:34 and I have made and broken a New Year's resolution in ONE SENTENCE!

In all honesty, I see myself more passionate about change. Resolute or not, I desire growth. I want to be the woman today that I would otherwise discover at age 71 that I had become.

Many of my clients are wise, gracious women well into their 60's and 70's and beyond. Their beauty is as much in their worn, wrinkled faces as in their wisdom and contentment for the lives they have lived. A commonality I find in most of them is their sense of peace, and their ability to assess and prioritize life.

Rarely do I see them worried about how their friends will perceive their beauty as the truth is (now) that they are simply glad for and cherish the friends they have. They are no longer fretting over their husband's failure to get their dropped drawers to the laundry basket as they probably once were. Rather, they are thankful for the many years of having the privilege of adding to the life a man who loved them and stood by them, through thick and thin. One who challenged them not only emotionally and mentally, but hopefully, spiritually.

These ladies have learned it is not so critical to them that they have found their sense of worth in their ability to achieve greatness in their careers as they have found value in being the family matriarch. A mother, grandmother, aunt, friend. Continuing or creating tradition for generations to come. Living their lives not only as examples but as a standard by which other's desire to emulate and measure up to.

They laugh loud, and often, simply for the purpose of laughing. Unaware of what other's may think. They dance about, and find reason to celebrate just about anything. They show a sense of pride in their homes, the sanctuary they created for their children and their children's children to come and visit. To celebrate Christmases, birthdays, and Sunday dinners. The place that, if they are or were married, their husbands longed to come home to, and where their children proclaimed to their children "we are going to GRANDMA'S house" (and everyone cheered.)

I want to be a wise old woman today and not wait a lifetime to appreciate life for what it is (and not wait to see what it could be-or should have been).

I want to be as confident and patient, peace filled and assured of my faith in my God as a woman who had a lifetime of experiencing the peace and faithfulness of God-without having to wait "said lifetime" or endured all the trials, hardships and personal failures in order to know it.

I don't know what the future holds but honestly, I have a great peace even in knowing that I just don't know. I want to have the attitude of a 6 year old, untainted by a lifetime of regret, disappointments, battles, and surprise attacks, unaware and uncaring of what others might think. I truly believe that is the trick to it all. I think that is what the 70 year old discovers and finally just "lets go.

I want my mind to wander, I want to dream of endless possibilities without my "rational-41-year old" brain talking sense into me. I want to twirl, and laugh and hope. I want to whisper about the boy I like to my best friend. I want to draw pictures of my dream house, and the perfect puppy. I want to make decisions based on my passions and beliefs and not out of fear of what other's might think. I want to risk the 'safe route" for the adventurous one. I want my life to be an encouragement to others to live their best life. To dream big and run fast and furious after their dreams. I desire to live the exact life that God intended, and I want to do it "today".

I admit I have never felt more comfortable in my own skin. I can see how the years "make us or break us" (and sometimes...break us in order to make us). I can celebrate that. I am starting to see how those wise old women get where they are and though I am in NO hurry to add wrinkles and calcium shots, blood pressure medicine and in home health care to my life, I am open to gaining wisdom beyond my years...and I already love bingo!

Happy New Year, and may you find your inner "old lady" (man) while you are still young enough to enjoy them!